This young man saw no value for his life and decided to make it his purpose to see how much damage he could inflict while having a good time. This led him to an unfulfilling life of addiction and found himself being arrested. Watch this motivational video and read his inspirational life story of how he finally came to understand his desperate need for God.
My life before God: I was an Atheist. I didn't believe in "god" or a "higher power" or "creation". Words that described my life would be dark, dirty, wrong, impure, stealing, drinking, drugging, gambling, fighting, intent to murder and selfish. I stabbed my friends in the back, stole money from friends, and stole girls from friends. I was bad to family; I treated them like crap and often took advantage of them. I swore lots. I had an awfully nasty mouth full of racial slurs and the most vile things that could possibly be uttered. I had no respect for anything, no respect for life or others or nature or society or earth. I was suicidal and at certain moments, homicidal. I had my hands cuffed behind my back with my hair in my face, sitting on a cold curb one Christmas morning. I was full of hate, confusion, depression and anxiety. I had no sense of purpose or fulfillment or destiny. I was lost and was on the verge of being a loss.
How I thought I needed God: my life was messed up and I knew that it wasn't the way I wanted things. I wanted something bigger, deeper and more meaningful. I tried quitting my life style of daily drinking, drugging and gambling but couldn't. Time and time again I would try to sober up and get clean but would always end up back in the endless cycle of addiction and crime. For over three years I tried everything I could think of to quit doing what I was doing. I tried every strategy, went through every thought process and even signed myself up for addiction counseling. I was my own worst enemy and I needed help or I was going to kill someone, kill myself or end up in jail.
How I Came To Know God: I went to a Christian alliance church and I saw that it was good for me. I realized that my time spent was better spent at church than it was with my friends. I'd be doing nothing but getting high, committing crimes and gambling on my Sunday mornings anyway so I thought I might as well go to church as see what possible help it could offer. I learned more about being a responsible person, a good person, a real person. I was learning about kindness, compassion and selflessness, things that were very unfamiliar to me. I continued to go and learn about God's love, His forgiveness, His mercy, His grace. I learned that God was good and that what I was before was bad. God was better than the other things I was doing, thinking and saying, so I stuck with God because it was practical, meaningful. . One day I took communion and said a prayer to Jesus. I said to Jesus, "if you are indeed real then please come into my life, show me how to live, show me what's up" I said. I came to believe that He indeed exists and is real. God began to reveal Himself to me in subtle and not so subtle ways. Through helpful tools like church, small groups and fellowship, God allowed me to come to know Him.
What life is like now with God: LIFE IS AWESOME AND GOD IS LIFE!!! I believe God is the source of the true, authentic life that we're all supposed to be living. God is who keeps me on a path of improvement. He's who keeps me clean off drugs and alcohol and away from all that other stuff that used to be in my life. God is withdrawing me out of everything that is unbeneficial and placing me into that which is beneficial. Life is now the best thing ever and is getting better every day. Before I encountered God life sucked and was getting worse every day to the point where I wanted to kill myself but now I'm absolutely on fire about life. God's there for me always, in the good times and the bad. He allows me to bear fruit and progress to success in all seasons of life. He shows me things I've never seen before, whether it be spiritual, emotional, financial, mental or physical. He's constantly revealing to me new wisdom and mentalities and allows me to perceive reality in a very powerful way. God grows me and teaches me more than any loving parent could. He watches over me and is with me everywhere I go, all the time. I now have this inner peace that is hard to shatter. I now have this solid foundation and can stand firm amidst chaotic situations. I am now living a better life, treating people better, being less selfish and more giving. I am able to forgive and forget. God empowers me to live with joy, not just happiness. God works in miraculous, super natural ways and allows me to witness, in awe, His awesome goodness.